Cornrows & french braids: I am back...

It's been close to 2 months since my last post. So many things have happened in those two months and I can't wait to tell you about all of it. Some is good (great even), some is hard, a little bit of sad along with a whole lot of growth in all of us.

Thanks for checking in with me. Thanks for being patient with me. I am looking forward to sharing with you again, soon.

Christall

Why?

After several emails asking why I chose to share such private family information I figured maybe others were curious as well. Here's the deal...

When we started the adoption process the only thing we ever heard was how great adoption was. How easy it was to fall in love with your new child. We heard how the children in Ethiopia were most beloved members of the family and society and because of that they weren't arriving home with *issues* such as RAD or FAS or other serious behavioral and mental issues.

We took all of that with a grain of salt - but also believed there was much truth in what we were hearing.

I want to share our story for two reasons. The first is that I want people to understand that parenting a child with HIV is not difficult. End of story. The second reason is that I hope to be a safe place to land for any other moms who are walking the path I walked over the last year. It was HARD and lonely and scary and I'm no where near the end of that trail - but it is my hope that by sharing the HARD stories, the ugly side of trying to find our new way, the less than pretty adoption stories, I can keep another mom (or dad) from feeling like they are doing something wrong.

There were days when I cried buckets because I was certain that I was the only adoptive parent who had dealt with this *stuff* - but now I know it's NOT TRUE... My experience, the day-t0-day stuff that we've had to endure, THAT is the normal stuff... the pretty butterfly and fluffy cloud adoption stories - those are the oddities... Older child adoption is HARD. If anyone tries to tell you otherwise, they're lying. It's hard, harder than you can imagine, but also worth every single difficult moment.

I want other adoptive families to know that there IS a time when this hard stuff will be a distant memory. I want my words, my stories to be your comfort. To provide respite when you feel alone and encouragement when you need it most.

That, my friends, is why I share the good, the bad, and the really, really unattractive parts of my life...

What you should know about HIV

HIV can NOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way.
It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles).

HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease (in the US where people have access to treatment).

With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives.

People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do.

If anyone wants more info on transmission, there is great info on the Center for Disease Control website at
http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/factsheets/transmission.htm

Our adoption timeline

9.11.09 - Coming home

8.23.09 - I leave for Ethiopia today

6.15.09 - Ava's TB testing is completed this week

3.18.09 - We passed court today... We are now the parents of Grace and Ava

2.26.09 - We were given our court date of March 18th!

2.25.09 - Our adoption coordinator let us know that the petition requesting a court date (in Ethiopia) has been filed and we should know when our hearing will be held. This is HUGE!!!

2.10.09 - All of our dossier paperwork is IN Ethiopia. The agency sent it to Washington D.C. to be authenticated and received it back last Friday. It was sent back out on Friday afternoon and arrived in Ethiopia yesterday (3 days). The documents are being translated into Amharic and when we receive our I171h everything will be ready so that we can apply for a court date.

2.9.09 - Fingerprinted at the Seattle office of Homeland Security (Immigration). Those fingerprints were sent to the FBI and we should have our I-797h approval soon!

2.6.09 - Our dossier documents were sent to Ethiopia today for translation.

1.17.09 - Received notification from USCIS of our fingerprint appointments on February 9th at noon!

1.16.09 - We received a letter from immigration letting us know we'll get our fingerprinting appointment soon!

1.15.09 - Rosie rec'd the package we mailed. She will deliver it to the orphanage and they will deliver it to our daughter!

1.12.09 - We were able to mail a package to our daugther that will be taken to Ethiopia by another family traveling to pick up their child. We are SO thankful to the families in our agency who are willing to give up the precious space in their luggage to take gifts and love to our waiting children. I can not wait until it is my turn to do the same!

1.12.09 - Dossier and all related adoption documents are sent to our agency. All of the paperwork is now submitted and we are offically just waiting

1.5.09 - I600a sent to USCIS in Yakima (now we're waiting for our fingerprint appointment)

1.4.09 - We received the completed/approved versions of our homestudy!

12.3.08 - documents sent to secretary of state for Apostille

11.27.08 - mailed a scrapbook I made of our family to Jim Harding. He is the director of our agency and is going to delivery the album to Ava for us.

11.22.08 - Final meeting with social worker - home study will be completed by the end of this week.

10.27.08 - First meeting with our social worker.

10.23.08 - faxed agency application - rec'd approval that same day

10.22.08 - Had a family meeting to decide if we were ready, as a family, to begin the process of bringing this little girl home (and we were!)

10.21.08 - Was sent a photo of Ava - the little girl destined to become our daughter

Cornrows & french braids

Saturday, June 5, 2010

I am back...

4 comments:

Why?

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